This will not be a hugely Pagan post. Fair warning.
A couple weeks ago, my kid wasn't allowed to go on a school field trip because she didn't turn in homework. I know she did it, I watched her but she forgot it at home. Fair enough. She has to learn personal responsibility. Last thursday she comes home upset because the big field trip to the Denver Zoo, that she has been looking forward to all year, she wouldn't be allowed to go to that either because *I* didn't get the grade check signed and turned in the next day. I didn't get home till 10, my daughter was already asleep I hadn't seen her all day cause well....I work.
So, I wrote a note to the teacher stating "I don't believe this is fair, I am asking you to reconsider. " Rachel now gets to go to the Zoo.
I made a flying visit home last night, in between work, and school everything seemed lovely. When I got home at 9, Rachel is still working on her rough draft for her paper on Polar Bears. After my mom had gone to bed, my daughter came in and said "Mom I need to speak to you"....After the week previous I wasn't sure what the conversation was going to be about.
at 2pm Rachel informs her teacher she has to go to the bathroom, Rachel is not allowed to go, about 5 minutes later Rachel tells her teacher she *really* has to go. About 5 minutes after that, my daughter wets herself in front of her class.
My Precious 5th grader. Who has such a hard time fitting in anyway, who feels that she is "abnormal" anyway. Is now the subject of ridicule. The kids called her "stinky pants" and the like. My precious angel was in tears.
I, on the other hand am livid. That is the start of it. Angry. Boiling to the point I feel that teacher should be fired is the other side of it.
How dare she? how absolute Dare she!
This woman thinks she can make my child the subject of ridicule, teasing, and bullying. Holy Crap.
So, at aprox 7:30 this morning I will be calling the school and having a talk with the principal. Another person who isn't exactly my favorite person. Mainly because her best reasoning for school uniforms is so she can tell the difference between my 5th grader, and a kid in high school. If she needs a UNIFORM to tell the difference? we need to get this woman's eyes checked. Never the less, it took a phone call to the county health board to get rid of the lice that that the school refused to get rid of. It took threatening to call the local TV station over them only talking about the Mexican American holidays. (We live in a primarily spanish area which is awesome rich with culture, but there are also Muslims, Irish, German etc here...if you are going to discuss a quinceanera you had damned well better discuss other cultural festivals).
I will throw in the "I'm a good pagan" part here. In that I didn't follow what my instinct was and send out every curse I knew (and I know a lot my grandmother was a cherokee medicine woman...I know a lot).
It took everything in my power *not* to call the other Pagans I know (alright personally I know 2 IRL)
But wow....I was frankly, Pissed.
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
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7 comments:
Forcing her to publicly wet herself is Legally child abuse.
That is a good point, I'd forgotten about that
In many states denying a child the right to go to the bathroom is illegal and if not illegal against school policy. (even if the child is one of those "I HAVE to go, every 5 minutes kids) they can call the parents to discuss it but that's it and I personally know of a case in which a teacher did exactly what your childs teacher did, the parents bade a formal complaint to the school board and the teacher was brought up on charges. At very minimum the teacher should be disciplined for her misconduct. teachers are supposed to lead our young and be role models for good. Damage by a teacher can go much farther than damage by students. In todays day and age where bullying is constantly on the forefront you would think that they would be far more aware.....
I'm so sorry. Same thing happened to my cousin back in the 70s and it was traumatizing. I respectfully recommend that you reinforce in your daughter the fact that teacher authority is a formality to be observed and no more. If she needs to use the restroom, she shouldn't take "no" for an answer. Anyone who lays a hand on her to prevent this will have bigger problems in short order.
Another recommendation is to call the local news. Don't threaten the principal or anything, just call. Your child may not be the only one with a terrible story, and this teacher must have light shown on those actions.
Most important: connect your child with a counselor. Public embarrassment and invalidation from authority can be scarring. Loving support is not enough and putting it in the past and moving on rarely works.
I know you are a fierce mom and don't need my recommendations, but hearing this story upset me and this is how I cope. Thanks for letting me spout off about it.
When my son was in elementary school he had the same problem. A particular substitute teacher he randomly had was strict that way. I told him to disregard her denying him the chance to go, and use the restroom when he needed. Then when she sent him to the Principals office, they would have to call me, and I would gladly go down there and deal with it! That's what he told her, and I never got a phone call.
That's horrible :( I think I would have to be restrained to calmly talk to anyone after they let that happen to my child. I was wondering how things turned out??
never the mind (just found the site and catching up on posts, lol)...just saw the next one...maybe I should start top and work down, lol..
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